Advent is the beginning of the new liturgical year. It’s also a season of preparation for Jesus’ coming – both on Christmas and his second coming. Spirituality is an important part of that preparation.
As Advent approached, Father Bill Bouhall, director of spiritual formation/spiritual director for Borromeo Seminary, the diocesan college seminary, spoke about the role of a spiritual director to Theology on the Rocks West. A group of about 60 listened as he shared his vocational journey, explaining that he first thought about the priesthood in college, but worked for a few years before entering the seminary at age 26.
His experience both in the seminary and after ordination included ministering at St. Brendan Parish, Deaconess Hospital, St. Felicitas Parish, St. Monica Parish, Malachi House and St. Thomas More Parish, where he served as both parochial vicar and 15 years as pastor before being asked to take on his current role.
“What is it (spiritual direction) all about and why do we need it?” he asked.
Father Bouhall told the group that prayer is important and we must understand it, he said, explaining that we get to know God through prayer.
“You talk and share when you get to know someone. God knows you, but he wants to hear from you,” he said. He used the analogy of a couple preparing for marriage and how important it is for them to share stories and what’s going on in their lives. “Bring that to God, as well. That’s prayer. You have to talk to God, to let him in. Vulnerability and transparency come from that. Go to God. He’ll always be there. You’re not alone in your joys and struggles,” he said.
Father Bouhall reminded the group that they must identify as beloved sons and daughters of God. A spiritual director can help with that by teaching a person to slow down.
“God wants the best for you. Let God be God; don’t tell God how to be God,” he said.
Sometimes, we don’t get what we want, but that doesn’t mean God doesn’t care about us. We will get what we need, he added.
As far as finding a spiritual director, Father Bouhall advised against asking a good friend to fill the role, noting it’s important to have someone who can be very honest and speak frankly to you. “You must share yourself and be able to relate to your spiritual director. The goal is to find intimacy with God because God wants to have intimacy with us.”
He said we may seek instant gratification and to fill up our lives with things that are harmful like sex, drugs, alcohol, etc. to fill the void – something that happens because of the influence of what he calls “the evil one (the devil).” Instead, he encouraged the group to “Let God into the void and you’ll be surprised.”
Father Bouhall said St. Ignatius of Loyola struggled with the devil before founding the Society of Jesus (the Jesuits). There are three voices we must know well – God’s, ours and the devil’s – and St. Ignatius learned that, he said.
“The role of a spiritual director is to get to know this well. The evil one uses lies to shame us. We all have sins, but God loves and forgives you. He already knows everything about us. He loved us first and is still proud of us because we are created in his image and likeness,” he said. “The evil one’s voice is loud, but God’s voice is soft and we must listen for it. A spiritual director will help you recognize the evil one’s lies.”
Awareness and awakening is the first step, followed by realizing you can see God and his goodness. It’s important to focus on that and not to be tempted by the evil one to turn away.
Spiritual consolation I being in a state of grace as opposed to spiritual desolation, which is pain and emptiness, he explained.
“Remember, the devil is an angel – a fallen one – and he is smart. He tempts subtly so it’s important to recognize his voice,” Father Bouhall said.
He used the analogy of a microwave, which cooks quickly, and a slow cooker that takes time but seasons and allows the flavors to blend through. “It’s like allowing God into our lives. We change.”
While sin hurts God, Father Bouhall said there is nothing we can do that God won’t forgive -- as long as we show contrition. A spiritual director will help you learn that and how to “feed on faith,” he added.
When asked how to find a spiritual director, he recommended asking a priest, someone who already has a spiritual director or check out resources like a retreat center.
“A spiritual director is like an accountability partner to help keep your prayer life on track and to go deeper into spirituality. It’s about your relationship with the Lord,” he said.
He encouraged interviewing potential spiritual directors until finding one that you can connect with and who will help you connect with the Lord.
“You may outgrow a spiritual director and that’s OK,” Father Bouhall said. “It’s OK to move on.”
Father Joseph Koopman, professor of moral theology at Saint Mary Seminary and Graduate School of Theology, will speak on “Bioethics: The Social, Ethical and Moral Issues of Bioethics” at Theology on the Rocks’ Dec. 12 meeting at LaCentre, 25777 Detroit Road, Westlake. Doors open at 6:30 p.m. with the program at 7. Cost is $15 at the door for light appetizers. A cash bar is available. Click here to reserve a seat.